Distracted

I have been QUITE distracted lately. I am taking a class that I HATE. I have been out of school way too long for this shit. My patience is just NOT THERE anymore. I am taking Business math and I have to figure out interest and such over certain time spans...what the hell is wrong with my brain that it JUST DOESNT CLICK!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I want to scream. ( Ok, I just did, I feel alot better now) Ask me to write a 200 page essay on the effects of global warming, and it will be done. Ask me to solve 3 problems in business math and Im screwed!!!

Ok Ok..just had to have some release...

Well. I am done babysitting the cat from hell, who actually turned out to be pretty cool. I was sad to see him go. He was some good company. I wonder what it would be like to have a dog in a one bedroom apartment? I really want a yellow lab BADDDDD but I think my landlords might not like that too much. And I dont have anywhere for him to shit. That wouldnt be good. I could just take him into the underground parking for him to do his business...I dont use the underground parking anyways...hehee.

So I got a cellphone. I HATE cellphones. If im not home, im not home. Leave me alone. BUT I am going on vacation, and it seemed like a good idea. So now Im stuck in a contract for something im going to end up swearing at more than I use. Thats just me though. Hehee.

Hmm...what other fun and exciting things are going on in my life...or what else can I make up today...

Im HAPPY to be done watching the kids!! I was watching my two nephews and niece for a few months about 3 times a week, and am now finished!! YAY! I can spend more time on school and my man and my blog. The blog being the most important, of course.

I am so rambling today because I feel I have been away from here for so long I have SOOOO much I want to write!! But Im going to keep it simple. So im done for a bit. I will probably throw some more in later.

quote of the day: "I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free." Michelangelo

I seem to have lost my blog...

Yes, H&B, you are correct. It seems that I had misplaced it a few days ago, and in cleaning again today, low and behold I found my blog again! So here I am!

I have been kind of busy...kind of neglecting. Ouch. NO MORE! I hereby swear to not neglect my blog. I will take care of my blog till death do we part. Oh blog, you are my shining light, my only one.

Now that Ive gotten all of that out of my system I will post a most extrordinary post on you, oh blog.

Today is the last day I have my two nephews and niece. Im excited, because I can focus more on this here. .blog...no, more importantly I can focus more on school. Im having a hard time with the business math... Anyone want to know how much I hate math? Well...I despise math. Math is the devil in disquise in my little world of me. I think that honestly it was put on my earth to taunt me and make me feel like the most unintelligent being alive. Oh math, how I hate thee!!

I am very happy lately. I am happy to have met someone that makes me laugh more than I had ever thought possible. It is not that I have just now met him, but the last few days have been kind of a turning, and that is the true reason for my neglect. How ironic that I dont post the happiest times of my life in my 'things that make me happy' blog, huh? But thankfully it means i havent been so alone.

Well! I am sorry for my slight absence of mind, but H&B, my fish oil is working JUST FINE! Its just the rest of you people in the world that are off a bit. hehee..

Quote of the day: " SURGEON GENERALS WARNING: Smoking causes lung cancer, Heart disease, Emphsema, and may complicate pregnancy" - Phillip Morris

vitamins

I want to start taking my vitamins today again. I used to take them daily, religiously. So today I start again with the daily vitamins, and of course my fish oil for my brain.

I am feeling very good today! Im off to gather things for a package I am sending someone, im excited, its almost like a treasure hunt. So many things to go find...sorry this is so short today but I am getting out of my house!! Yay!


Quote of the day: "Hope is the denial of reality" -Margaret Weis

colors

I have decided to put more color into my house and my wardrobe...im slightly bland when it comes to color. I absolutely hate pink, and light blue. Im not so fond of lavender either, but love a deep purple. Sooooo... my colors are very earthy..not browns though..greens and oranges and dark wood accents. LOTS of plants.... sooo I need color. Im going to either throw some purple in the mix or maybe was thinking or some pale yellow...(yes, i know, how BRIGHT, lol..)

Ok...that was just my mind rambling on...now to the serious post.

The slowness of this server is really starting to irritate me...I cant post comments to denny's blog and race him for a response...its just not as much fun anymore! hahaa

Sooo, im having this problem, I really really hate doing dishes. Im thinking that Im just going to throw them all away, go to a thrift store, pick up some more, throw those away when Im done, get some paper and plastic dishes, use those, and throw them away as well. Now if only you could get disposable clothes...( I hate laundry too)... Im thinking Im not the domestic type. And yet I LOVE to be at home, and cooking for people and I dont mind cleaning the rest of my house...hmmm. Im thinking I wouldnt make a very good wife (sorry Denny, Im going to have to call off the wedding)

I really like quotes...I just love words and how people use them...I would like to dedicate todays comments to quotes. If you have a favorite quote please post it..If there are alot of posts I want to start a blog of all quotes...for people who enjoy that sort of thing and want somewhere to go for a daily quote..other than this blog which sometimes is very very boring to have to read through the whole thing JUST to get to the quote on the bottom. ( I know you do that H&B, so dont even try denying it!!) LOL

Quote of the day: "Want to make your computer go really fast? Throw it out a window."

I want you here

I am sitting here, pulling my hair out of my head, waiting ANXIOUSLY for my sister to come pick up here demon spawn children. Usually I am having so much fun with them, however...the fact that they have demolished my house, punched each other in the face...managed to scare even the Satan cat...Ive had about all I can handle. I dont know if I can have kids...I would be SOOOOO stressed all the time I think. (im sure you get used to it...but AHHHHHHHH) So here I sit...tense as I can POSSIBLY be...my head is pounding, my hair falling out. I need some release... I would love to have some wild crazy sex right now...but since that is NOT an option right now I am writing in my blog. What a trade off, huh? (yeah right...sorry guys...I think the sex would be better) Hmmm... I wonder why it is when I get frustrated or flustered I always seem to want to have sex? Is that normal? I sure hope so...

Ok...some strange odd tid bits of info about me for anyone who wants to know:

I cant sleep with socks on. well, honestly, I cant stand having socks on EVER. Only when I am wearing shoes. I dont care how cold it is, socks drive me crazy.

I cannot start reading a book without reading to the end. I have called in sick to work to finish reading a book. When I have really large novels it kills me to have to put them down...it is SOOOO hard.

I always have a vase of fresh flowers on my desk. Usually tulips or wildflowers.

I have a picture of my nephews on my desk...I like that sometimes better than having them here in the flesh...(especially today....!!!!)

I ALWAYS have at least 4 cups of coffee in the morning...hazlenut creme with fat free vanilla creamer.

I have music playing in the background at ALL times...

I do not ever use cash for anything...always credit or debit. I hate having cash on me.

I have about 15 plants in my living room, it is a tropical paradise...nah, not even close...but I like the feelings of the outside being inside..I have 2 books on how to keep them alive and happy and often like to sprout new babies from the plants I have. My oldest plant is 7 years old.

Ok...thats enough for now. Too much info and I will no longer be interesting...hehee..(not that I ever was...but I can dream)

Quote of the day: Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs. P.J. ORourke

The cat

Ok, I feel somewhat bad for calling the cat Satan yesterday. Today he is my best friend, rubbing up against my leg, purring madly. (his name is Simbah...not Satan as I previously wanted to call him...) SOOOO what I have concluded is that maybe I am Satan for being so so judgemental to the poor frightened animal.... Hmmm...THANK GOD that I didnt decide to throw him off of the porch...er..that he didnt jump off of the porch like he was going to!! I would have felt horrible!

So today I checked 3 different mailboxes...the great part, everyone got mail but me. Go figure. I am going to dust tomorrow...and water the plants. Then Im gonna 'forget' for a few days..(what is the difference for 2 days really???) and then Ill repeat in a few days. How fun and exciting huh? Im so glad that they left, giving my life meaning again! (who am I kidding Im bored off of my ass)

Nah, Im thankfully not bored at all. I have WAY too much going on right now with school, a boy, tending to everyones business, and now tonight my nephews again...I will enjoy tomorrow when it is just for me. I am soo excited for tomorrows answer to my question on Denny's site!! I have been waiting YEARS to know the difference between a couple and a few....

Ok...Quote of the day and then Im outtie like clam chowdie: There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it. ~Mary Wilson Little

The joys of children I can send home!!

What a fun time! I had my nephew 'camp out' for the night ( no slumber party, I wont say that ever again to him!!) and we have had so much fun. I wonder if I will ever truly stop being a kid. I worry sometimes...but then again I have more fun than alot of people I know my age...so screw it! I know that Im not ready for kids, but I love them and have fun with them...so a kid I will be with them! I really dont care what anyone around me thinks of it. ( my mother: KC when are you going to grow up??) I hope I never truly grow up...

So a group of four of my friends went to Cozumel for the week, and left me here all alone. Im so so jealous (damn school!!) On top of that, ALL four of them left me their chores to do while they are gone...'check my mail, water my plants, take my cat for two weeks, wash my car when the weather is nicer, can you also do some light dusting?' Bahhhh!! The things I do for my friends :) BUT I also get alot of time to myself...and I like that too. They are constantly popping in. Haha...I actually love that, who am I kidding?? Im going to miss them terribly.

The only thing about it that I am NOT liking is Greg's satan cat that is staying with me. He sits next to me and hisses at me..for absolutely no reason. I LOVE animals and this cat is seriously the devil.

Ok, last thing... Happy Birthday A !! I hope that you get everything that you wish for and more!

quote of the day: Soul meets soul on lover's lips. Percy Bysshe Shelly

Then and Now

I was just reflecting on my past, and on how different it is now compared to a year ago. I want to just jot down some of the major differences in my life.

Then: I lived in a 3 story duplex with my friend Tom and spend all of my time in my room
Now: I live in a one bedroom apartment and spend all of my time wherever the hell I feel like spending it.

Then: It was uncommon for me to be home more than 20 minutes at a time...I would work, come home, get ready, and go out.
Now: It is uncommon for me to be OUT of my house more than 20 minutes a day.

Then: I was so unhappy and thought I was never going to be able to love anyone again after Led. And was determined to be miserable forever
Now: Im looking forward to falling in love again and am excited for my future.

Then: I worked at a furniture store managing an office getting paid way to little to do way too much
Now: I am getting unemployment from before mentioned furniture store and am going to school to be able to do what I really want.

Then: I lived my life according to how I was supposed to.
Now: I live my life according to how I WANT to.


I think all in all Im alot luckier now and happier than before. I would not change any of my life...even the bad things. They make me who I am today. And Im pretty proud of myself for overcoming alot of what I have overcome. The only thing left to do is quit smoking...then I will have conquered all of my vices. And I will feel like nothing in the world can stop me from being who I want to be and getting all that I want!!!!


Quote of the day: " When your confidence flies away, just close your eyes and tell yourself that you can do it. Believe in yourself and you will come alive."
Karen John

Cant stop smiling

Ok, I cannot stop smiling. I have been smiling for two days straight now. (No Denny ..I unfortunately wasnt out 'galavanting' and am reveling in the glow...)

Ok...here is my story...

I seem to have met the most amazing person I have ever known. I think im somewhat insane because I havent known him long but can not get enough of him!! I smile talking to him, I smile not talking to him, Im probably smiling when Im sleeping. Its crazy!! I can talk to him every hour of every day and not get bored. That has NEVER happened for me before. (im very impatient and bore easily..lol...not a good quality of mine if I may say so myself! ) I get a warm feeling inside of me everytime I talk to him.. I dont want to say too much. I just wanted to express how I was feeling right now, because this is my 'things that make me happy' page and this right now is making me so unbelieveably happy....

onward to the question of the day....(obviously going to be sex related...just for you Denny...) What do you think is an appropriate waiting period before having sex with someone you are dating or are interested in?

SOOOOOO interested to hear ressponses to this...then I will have to post what I think too...


Quote of the day: "When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us." ~Hellen Keller

Ok Ok

Ok, ok, as much as I try to be sooooo innocent and naive (yeah right) ..I must admit... Sex makes me happy. (there! I said it!) talking about it, participating in it, thinking about it. Buutttttttttttttt....the real happiness for me in it is when I can share it with someone I feel passionately about. Sex without passion is just a motion. I really have no use for meaningless sex. I want the candlelight, the soft music, the kisses on my neck and up my arms and down...I want the whispers in my ear...the moonlight shining through the window. THAT is what makes me happy about sex. Experiencing it with the raw emotion and passion and surroundings that make the hair on my arms stand on end and my toes curl in pure delight.

Quote of the day: Of the delights of this world, man cares most for sexual intercourse. He will go to any length for it-risk fortune, character, reputation, life itself. ~Mark Twain

WOOHOO!

Yay! A happy day with things to be happy about! I am thankful today for A who makes me laugh and smile more than I have in a long long long long time! Hmm...gotta think of something interesting to post today. (not a streaking story, sorry Denny) I dont have anything too interesting, Im in a good mood and I dont know exactly what to write about. My small group of friends that I hang out with are all going to Cozumel on friday. Im stuck at home alone watching the cats. Hmmm...no better way to feel like a 30yr old spinster. Staying at home, alone, with the cats. I would SOOOO rather be in the fun and sun with them! Im jealous, but at the time they planned the trip was working and couldnt get off of work...now all this free time, and no Cozumel. Oh well. Im wondering what I am going to do with myself with all of them gone. I will just have to blog blog blog! Im happy today to be happy. So that is it for today. Just that. And today that is good enough for me!!

If you have nothing good to say dont say anything at all.

I am taking this advice today. It is not a good day and I have nothing at this very moment that I can think of to make me happy. So instead of ranting in this post, I will do so in my other one and leave this one free from scars.

Quote of the day: "Whatever does not kill me makes me stronger."-Friedrich Nietzsche

Thank you Thank you

Thank you Thank you Happy and Blue for giving me the opportunity to post about something non-sex related. I was beginning to get a bit "frustrated" if you know what I mean....so I am to take the quiz, that for some reason reminds me of something from seventh grade home room...but it is something to post about! Fun Fun...so here goes...

list 3 names you go by

Casey
Babykakes
Casegoods (dont ask)

3 screen names you have

Zipless74
Vogue0889
KC

3 things you like or dislike about yourself

like my honesty
dont like my teeth
like my eyes

3 parts of your heritage

German
dutch
Irish

3 things that scare you

flying
flying
flying

3 of your everyday essentials

coffee
cigarettes
diet pepsi

3 things you are wearing right now

sweatshirt
jeans
toe socks

3 of your favorite bands/artist

Muse
Dave Matthews
Counting Crows

3 of your favorite songs

It Had To Be You- Billie Holliday
Say Goobye- Dave Matthews
Everlong- Foo Fighters


3 new things you want to do in the next 12 months

go to another country
grow out my hair
stop smoking

3 things you want in a relationship
honesty
passion
sex (had to put it)

2 truths and a lie

I am a former beauty queen
I am freezing
I am in need of some sex real soon

3 physical things about a love interest that appeals

Over 6ft tall
Dark mysterious eyes
kissable lips

3 things you just can't do

play the drums
do anything to hurt anyone I love
sing

3 of your favorite hobbies

Listening to music
writing
reading

3 things you want to do really bad right now

hmmm...have sex
go to Italy
break my bed (dont ask)

3 careers you are considering

Web design
consulting
Opening a bookstore/coffee shop

3 places you want to go on vacation

Australia
Africa
Italy (most recent addition)

3 kids names

I have none...so I hope this is hypothetical

Kieran
Eloise
Saphronetta..hehee


3 things you want to do before you die
Travel the world
Get married
have kids....maybe

3 people that have to take this quiz

I would hate to do that to ANYONE...so

Happy and Blue
Happy and Blue
Happy and Blue


ok...going out for the evening now!

Time to fly

Ok, todays theme...it is not going to be about flying, so anyone all excited about the title, sorry. As I sit here, smoking my cigarette..wondering..why the hell am I smoking this cigarette? I think my theme will have to be about....MUSIC! I am thankful today for music. It is so so uplifting to me. Im also thankful today to have met my new friend from Italy who has given me lots of music to trigger lots of memories. My favorite thing in the world is to be brought somewhere else by the power of a song.

Well that was boring.

Ok, so on to sex. Question...is it wrong to just want the 'sex' for the 'sex'? I am not all about sex without passion, but sometimes (and you all know what I mean) you just want the sex. Im tired of waiting for the passion, and have a "friend with benefits" who tends to satisfy most needs..but for some reason right now feel bad about using that option. I never have before, but now for some reason it feels wrong. Anyone have any opinions on that? Maybe its because I really want the passion, so the sex isnt as important...but damn I want the sex. It must be all this sex I have been reading about on these blogs lately...(hmmm..Passion Friday...thanks Jen)

Well, that was a little too serious...onward and upward...

Damn, now I just keep thinking about sex.

Quote of the day: "The entire sum of existence is the magic of being needed by just one other person." -Vi Putnam

In the theme of sex...

Seems in most blogs I have been reading the common theme of the week is sex. So unable to stop myself...I must jump right on that bandwagon and say... today I am thankful for sex. Not that I am having much opportunity lately to really revel in that thankfulness...but the fact that it is out there waiting for me at any moment makes me thankful enough. Ok, so what makes me happy about sex you may ask? (or not, who really needs to ask a question like that!) well...what better way to express that than a top 10 list explaining my favorite details about sex... (killed two birds with one stone...sex and a top 10 list...im good, huh?)

1. I love kisses. You may have read this in a previous post, but there is nothing more sensual or passionate to me than a well delivered kiss.
2. I am a sucker for fingers through my hair. I love it when a man pulls his fingers through my hair and I can feel it to my toes.
3. Eyes open kisses...Im so a romantic, but I find it extremely erotic to stare into his eyes while having sex and while kissing..I like to see the raw emotion..
4. little nibbles...I love little nibbles (not ferocious biting) on the inner thigh..the shoulder, the neck...mmmmm...love the nibbles.
5. lack of control, being a control freak it is a complete turn on for me when the control is taken away from me during sex. I love having my hands pinned above my head. ( hmmm...being tied up not so bad either...but that may be getting a little descriptive for my PG-13 ratings)
6. Whispers in my ear..I love to be talked to, not necessarily"want more bitch, want more!" but " you are so soft here, I could kiss you for weeks" ....
7. I love it when the release is timed well enough that we are both in never never land together...feeling it at the same time.
8. Being devoured head to toe.
9. sometimes into more of a raw animal like hunger..but thats mostly when I have aggressions to release...
10. The warmth and electricity felt by having someones body that close to mine....

ok...that is my sex post. Hope you enjoy it.

Quote of the day: "Sex is like a bridge game; if you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand."

A car that runs

Today my car is fixed! YAY! I can now venture out into the world! I do not have to sit alone at this damn computer, I can go visit friends! SO today is about my car being fixed and getting out of the house for awhile.

Im happy today for flowers. I went and bought 2 dozen purple tulips to put on my desk, so that while I was wallowing in all of my self pity over the loads and loads of homework I have to do I would have something pretty to look at. They are making me feel like it is NOT 5 degrees outside, snowing and bitter cold. And today that makes me happy. Im not such a lover of cold weather, you see. So Im enjoying looking at my flowers, imagining that I am ANYWHERE warm. Ok, now I get to leave my house for the day. Im not so excited to bundle all up for my journey, but I am excited to get out for a bit!

Quote of the day: Love is when you look into someone's eyes and see their heart.- Jill Petty -

Happy to be alive.

Today I am just happy to be alive. I am not going to get all mushy in this blog...and I dont want to be repeatative as I already wrote more about this in the other blog. But being that it is almost the anniversary day I am just happy to be alive. I havent felt that in awhile. I am happy to have such awesome friends. Family can be somewhat lacking...but thats just life I guess. And my friends more than make up for it.

Im also happy that Greg and Matty's offer for their house went through!! Im soo excited for them, what a beautiful house it is!! Im glad it all fell into your lap as wonderfully as it did!

And Im happy for all the lovely comments I receive on my blog..thanks for reading, I know its not always the most exciting thing in the world...just tid bits of me.

Having the phone company actually come through for me...

Are you in shock, because I sure as hell am! "we will be there between 4 and 6" and OMIGOD they were! Im very happy to now have a telephone, it has been 3 weeks, and being that I am not technilogically advanced enough to own (or want) a cell phone...it has been, well, kinda quiet.

I am having my nephews over Saturday night for a "slumber party". Should be a good time..so my question to all of you with kids is for ideas of something fun and unusual to do with them, we always do the same things. Being that I have no kids myself, I am running out of options! Ages are 4 and 6. Two boys.

Quote of the day: A friend is someone who walks inwhen the whole world has walked out.
- Anonymous -

Giving

Ok, one thing that makes me happy is giving people things I think will make them happy. Yes, I am one of those. A "pleaser" person. But it makes me feel good to know someone else is smiling. So today I was surfing the net, doing a little shopping and came across this cd that reminded me of a friend. It struck me quite strongly that he needed to have this cd. Whether he loves it or not, it made me think of him and he must have it. So I thought, how in the hell am I going to get this cd to him when I dont know his address...so i emailed a barnes and noble online gift card to his email address for a whopping 15 dollars...(the cd was 11 I think) with directions to buy that cd and only that cd. That made me smile. Mostly because he is someone I know will not only appreciate the guesture made but the music regardless. So hoping that it didnt come across as odd, sending an online gift card with instructions on what to buy, I sent it. Did a similar thing for a friend awhile back for a book I thought he should have. The other thing today that made me happy was hanging out with the kids. That always makes me happy though...

Quote of the day: "The heart has its reasons that reason does not know."-Blaise Pascal

Coffee~(again)

Im so so sorry to be so repetative...but today I am again SOOO thankful and happy to have coffee. Can we say addicted?? I have only had one pot today, and for that, again im thankful and happy. One more pot and I would probably turn somewhat manic...."what??? what was that?? I know I heard something!" Nah, ill stick to the one pot today. I enjoy my sanity on occassion.

Happy to see that you made it out of your computer alive, Daniel. I was so sure that it ate you. And knowing that it didnt puts my mind at ease. I have called off the rescue mission I had planned for later tonight. Glad to know you were merely abducted by your bed, might have been able to help you out there too however..(did I make you blush??) OK. Enough of that nonsense! I am going to go do homework now and find out exactly how rotten my brain has become over the last ten years of selfishness (ie. drinking, drinking, drinking, and drinking) Not so sure how many brain cells I have left, but there is no time like the present to find out!

Quote of the day: "And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music."-Friedrich Nietzsche

School at my age...am I insane??

It is very possible that I am going to go completely insane this year with school at my age. The awesome thing about it, however, is that I absolutely love it. I am so excited and very very happy to be going back to school. It just makes me feel like there is so much more out there for me...if that makes sense to anyone?!? It makes sense to me, so that is all that matters. I got an Email from an instructor telling me I was doing well and to keep up the good work. I felt like a kid again being praised for my macaronni art work! It was awesome! So right now Im feeling pretty good and happy about that.

Quote of the day: "The pursuit of truth and beauty is a sphere of activity in which we are permitted to remain children all our lives."-Albert Einstein

Friends

Today it is friends that make me happy. I was happy to be able to spend time with friends last night. More specifically Michael. He is a lot like me and I always enjoy talking to him and can always talk to him about anything, being completely open the whole time. So I am happy that I got to talk to him last night.

I am also happy today that Daniel was not abducted by aliens. I was worried for a few days, thought you were going through all that poking and prodding....good to see you are back in one piece...when they talk to you, ignore them, thats what I do.

Quote of the day: "It's the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter."
- Marlene Dietrich

coffee

Today I am thankfull and happy for coffee. I went to sleep tired and woke up tired, and coffee and a granola bar eagerly awaited me and now I feel great! So thanks to you, coffee, for making today a (caffiene induced) happy day!!

Thank you to Happy and Blue for the info on how to add Links, I have added you first to my Blogs I read column because without you I would not have been able to HAVE a blogs I read column, and you have such a lighthearted and fun blog I wanted to post it on "what makes me happy" rather than my main blog. So anyone who accidentally falls into this blog, also go check out Happy and Blue....

Hmmm...I am not going to write anything negative in this blog whatsoever at any given time...it is an experiment of sorts to find out if thinking (and writing) only happy thoughts will lighten up my days :) So far it is working well...ill keep you posted!


QUOTE OF THE DAY: Do it trembling if you must,but do it !- Unknown -

Damien Rice

...Damien Rice makes me happy. I absolutely love his music. Soo soooooo emotional. I could listen to it over and over again and still get chills up my spine and a smile on my face. He is my what makes me happy today. Greg coming over to play Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy on the PS2 also makes me happy. What a fun night we will have! Smiles for today will also have to come from the fact that I started school. I have been so nervous and did my assingments to day with ease. That but a HUGE smile on my face.

Hypothetically speaking

Perfect first date:

You will meet me at my house, I will have wine and funky background music playing. We will talk for a little to break the ice so that by the time we leave the house we are comfortable with each other and can just enjoy the night. I will have some stupid props or a challenge set for the night, like "ok, whoever can fake sneeze and have more strangers say bless you buys dessert" and we will have silly chat on the way to dinner. Once at dinner I will ask you to tell me about yourself, I want to know everything about you. You will ask me the same, and when I look into your eyes I can see the curiosity and sincerity and feel I can bare my soul to you...but dont (its just the first date) so I just tell you about my dreams and aspirations and keep the conversation light and fun. We then decide we want to spend more time together and instead of going to a movie or something traditional like that we decide to drive to the next town, where neither of us knows anyone and the population is 1000 and decide to check out their local night life. We drive for an hour conversation NEVER faltering and get to the "saloon" and stick ten dollars in the juke box and play the best things we can find on a jukebox in the middle of nowhere town we are visiting. We sit down and order some drinks and talk some more. Deciding that we want to spend even more time together I take you to a place I used to spend alot of time writing at on the bay. It is a little beach hidden behind a bunch of trees at the end of the road. The road is called Point Comfort by the way...and is one of my favorite places in the world. We sit in the sand and look at the stars and sky and keep talking. We havent stopped talking since the wine and funky music. I look at my watch and it is 5 am and I dont want to go home yet. So we sit and watch the sun come up, I lay my head on your shoulder and fall asleep. You wake me up and take me home and give me a brief yet passionate kiss and leave. And I dream about you all night.

THAT is my perfect date. All realistic and possible. All places are possible to go to

smiles

Things that make me smile are:

Andrew, nephew, 4 years old and the most mischievious child. What makes me smile are the times when he wants something from me and comes slowly towards me and says "Casey, I love you" and then says " can I have a cookie?". Makes me smile (of course I turn around, so he doesnt see me..)

Lauryn, niece, 9 mos old. She is absolutely beautiful. What makes me smile with her is that im around her alot and can see my influences on her. My favorite one is singing. She doesnt talk yet, but we sing. If I sing real soft and low to her, she will hum real soft and low, if I sing loud and happy she screams loud and happy. It makes me smile all the time. She makes me smile all the time.

Stupid jokes and sarcastic banter. ALWAYS will make me smile.

A good tune that takes me back to another place and another time. Whether it be a good or bad place in my life, it makes me feel, and that makes me smile.

Seeing people I love that Im not able to see often. That would make me smile.

Kisses. I love kisses and they make me smile.

The days my car will start make me smile.